God Cried Too
October 21, 2003
As we travel down the road of life, and as we travel through the states, our weather has been so fantastic! It seems most days are filled with beautiful blue skies and sunshine. The weather is now changing and getting warmer as we are heading south. We’ll soon be in Florida for a couple of months. Our clothing changes from sweatshirts to short-sleeve shirts as we go, and are enjoying each day for the adventures that it holds.
Just yesterday, I spent the day with a friend here in
Alabama. We went bike riding along the Tennessee River, and after that we drove
up to Green Mountain where we walked along a beautiful path that encircled a
lake on the mountain. It is not a huge mountain, not a huge lake, but so
colorful as the leaves are changing into all the falls colors. Colors we don’t
see as often in most places in California.
As my friend and I walked around the lake, stopping often
to enjoy God’s creation, I was reminded once again of all the things that we
are enjoying on the road. Things that we would have missed had we not answered
God’s call to be here. Each experience along the way opens up a new world to
us that we easily could have missed--time spent with friends and family, each
new journey and the wonderful places that expand our view of God and His
creation as we follow Him from place to place.
This trip across the states has a plan, it has a schedule, and it keeps us moving a bit faster than we would like, but even in that, we see God leading us. As we stopped in Casper, Wyoming to have our "home" worked on at the factory, we met with others who were also there for repairs. In meeting and talking with them, we found new information about which states were best for full-time RV’ers and after a few phone calls; we realized South Dakota was not to be our home state. Florida would be better for that after all.
God knew this all along--before we ever left home. We didn’t. God put these people in our path, sharing this information with us. He had us spend time with them as we waited in the lounge for our homes to be repaired, sharing our lives with one another. God opened the door of communication with them as we told them about Phil and his leukemia, only to find out that this couple was also dealing with leukemia. The gentleman had been diagnosed six years ago with a different type of leukemia. It still allowed him to live a pretty normal life on the road.
God travels on ahead of us when we keep our focus on Him. He prepares the path ahead and helps us each day, even though at times it seems we are the ones charting the course. Jim is the one looking at the maps, loading it into his GPS unit so we have our little lady (the voice in the machine) telling us which highways to take, where to turn left, and where to turn right and when we are off course she calmly states, "off course, recalculating." Sometimes we have to turn her off!
So who is leading us, the lady in the machine, our own plans and schedules, or our Father God? The farther we go, the more we experience, the more we see God leading the way each day.
As I read in the Psalms yesterday:
Yet how quickly they forgot what he had done!
They wouldn’t wait for his counsel!
Psalm 106:13
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It reminds me of how important it is to wait upon God, to look for His leading, because we never know what is up ahead. As we left California, we didn’t know that we would need to be traveling all the way to Florida to become residents, but God did. We could have easily gotten to South Dakota, with plans of then returning to California and our lives there, and not been ready to venture all the way across the states. But God knew better, and He directed our paths, and He let us know it was time to "disconnect" from the Bay Area and be ready for travel. The news that we would need to go on to Florida then did not disturb us but only made us grateful that God had prepared us fully for doing so.
God is so good, and He cares so much, and He never leaves us if we will only seek Him each day. He surely will guide us and He knows that the way is not always easy, but it is possible with Him.
Last Thursday, being Phil’s birthday, was a difficult day...and it rained. It was the only day since starting this trip where the skies opened up and showered on us. Only once before had we needed windshield wipers on this trip, and that was only for a brief period on the way to Oregon, just a few raindrops.
The heavy rain we encountered last Thursday seemed so appropriate, since my heart was crying also. It seemed that God understood the pain. In a month of travels, the only rainy day came on the most difficult day we have had, and it seemed to me that God cried too.
Is that crazy thinking? Does God really care that much? Is that just a coincidence? And what about all the other people who were not sad on that day, what about the rain falling on them? It involved more than just our truck going down the road through the raindrops...
Well, I don’t have all the answers to all those questions, and I don’t know what others are dealing with as they drive down the same roads we do through the rain, but I do know about my God, and I do know about His care in my life, and I know that He has counted each hair on my head and He cares about each day we live, and that He is faithful. Seeing Him in all things is not craziness. Instead, I have found, it makes life make more sense.
God calls us not to forget all that He has done in our lives.
In Psalm 106, the people forgot...
Verse 7: They soon forgot his many acts of kindness to them.
Verse 13: Yet how quickly they forgot what he had done!
Verse 21: They forgot God, their savior, who had done such great things in
Egypt—
But God remembers:
Verses 44-45, Even so, he pitied them in their distress and listened to their
cries. He REMEMBERED his covenant with them and relented because of his
unfailing love.
God’s love is unfailing, and He hears our cries to him. We are not left alone to deal with the things of this world. God created this world and He longs to help us through it on our way home to Him.
So sometimes, perhaps, God even lets the heavens cry with us in our pain. He sends the clouds and the rain on the day when our tears fall, and then He helps us move on, just as He did the next morning when, once again, the weather had changed back to blue skies and sunshine.
God wants us to remember all that He has done for us. He doesn’t want us to miss out on what He is doing in our days, and in our nights. He is with us. He is our friend, and even when the hurts and the pains come, it never means that He has deserted us. He REMEMBERS us always, and longs for us to turn to Him for help. He listens, and He sends us peace and He reminds others to cover us with their prayers when times are hard.
Psalm 107:13-15
"Lord, help!" they cried in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
He led them from the darkness and deepest gloom;
he snapped their chains.
Let them praise the Lord for his great love
and for all his wonderful deeds to them.
We have been covering lots of miles, almost 5,000 so far across the states. It is a much faster pace than what we hope to do in the future, but winter is setting in and the northern states are not where we will want to be. But God is leading us south now, and is giving us great times of rest along the way.
As we pulled in here by the Tennessee River, it was time to rest. Time to enjoy
the beauty and the trees and the mountains and the lakes. Time to be with friends,
and reminisce and laugh and watch the Raiders almost beat Kansas City!
A time to remember what God is
bringing us to, and what He has planned for us, because there is an adjustment to
all of this. It seems that God is gently helping us through that time of change
and missing and moving forward by letting us rest, catch our breath, and also by
placing many people along our path to help us ease into this new life on the road.
He is always REMEMBERING us and His promise to be with us.
It is a pleasure to travel through the days with Him and watch Him unfold this world before us. It is a challenge to be here away from our comfort zone, but God knows our hearts are ready to be stretched and grown in this new way. There was a time when any stretching would have been extremely painful to an already broken heart, but our hearts are known to God--better than anyone else can know them—He knows our deepest thoughts and desires. He knows when we are ready for change. He molds us gently yet firmly in His loving hands and takes us where we need to go even if it seems it is a place we would not have chosen.
Never would I have chosen the road that He has taken us down with the loss of our son, but God is painting a beautiful picture here. He is creating lives to be lived for Him, to expand His Kingdom and let no day be wasted.
As one friend recently wrote to me,
"You made every opportunity count with and for Phil while he was still
with us. He lived an abundant life even with leukemia. How many people
waste their days in healthy bodies, but not Phil. He experienced more
than someone might in an entire lifetime and dieing of old age. He was
loved and blessed, so are you."
How true! Phil experienced so much because his time was not to be wasted. Because of his illness, we were able to realize how precious time was and use it more wisely. What a great example he left us with, and we shall carry on with that example until our dying day.
On Phil’s birthday this year, God cried too, and then God stopped crying and brought the sun out to shine again in our lives. Hard times don’t last, life moves on, and no day is to be wasted. Even the days that hurt are brought to teach us something important when we are focused on our Savior. He will lead us out of our darkest days and show us the way we should go.
Gotta hit the road now! Jim is packing up the house, and if I’m not careful, he may hitch up and drive down the road with me still here in bed!
The Son is shining and we are off once again!
Living in His peace and joy,
Diane
